


fortune cookies

by saturnnn



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Gen, M/M, first work (jesus help me), i dont even ship this what am i doing, i just saw deadpool today okay, its either pre slash, mature bc im paranoid, or wade is just very flirty and pansexual
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-01
Updated: 2018-07-01
Packaged: 2019-05-31 15:03:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 432
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15121976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saturnnn/pseuds/saturnnn
Summary: a rather strange, kinda flirty conversation between the two that may or may not include messed up courting gifts.aka i just saw deadpool today, havent seen deadpool 2, and have never written anything on ao3 before but its midnight and have this.





	fortune cookies

**Author's Note:**

> jesus save my messed up soul  
> im tired and trying to figure out how to work ao3 have pity please

At this point, tony stark has seen everything, and lived through most of it too. He just might not survive this, though. a merc with a very explicit vocabulary wearing red spandex with an inability to die might just bring him to his knees (but not in the way said merc may or may not want).

‘Tony!! Tony tony tony, you'll never believe what i found today’

a deep sigh and a very monotone voice. ‘... what.’

‘This really great chinese place!! my taxi buddy dopinder and i were looking for a place to grab some shit to eat besides the usual murder dump and by all that is motherfucking holy, they have the best fortune cookies i have ever tasted. I stole all that i could for you!’ the man is practically bouncing during his ramble, and proceeds to drop a questionably sized box on tony's work table. Speaking of, how the fuck did wade get in here anyway? 

_I'm definitely too tired for this shit._ ‘Question, is this supposed to be some kind of weird courting gift?? oh , and follow up question, this looks way too big to just be carrying some fortune cookies, what did you do?’

The merc tried to wink under his mask, and although it didn't quite work, he felt it conveyed his answer. ‘Only if you want it to be, sweetheart. and why don't you open the box up and find out? i put some limited effort into this bullshit, which is the best you'll ever get from my lazy ass.’

with a prolonged sigh, the stark opened the box that supposedly held fortune cookies. Inside was, indeed, probably 50+ fortune cookies, along with a bundle of half dead roses, presumably one with deadpool’s old katanas (still with dried blood on it), and a small card that held a childish drawing of wade himself in what was probably supposed to be some kind of suggestive pose. Signed ryan reynolds, oddly enough. he figured it was best to just.. not ask.

‘did you like my gift?!?!’ the scarred man had questionable sanity indeed, but it was starting to grow on tony.

‘Sure, wilson, sure,’ he stated at a much quieter volume.

‘Wanna go to the restaurant with me and get more fortune cookies??’

tony eyed the drops of red following wade’s scattered path on the floor, probably from another quickly healing wound he had acquired. ‘if you agree not to track blood into my lab again, then okay. do we really need more fortune cookies though?’

wade grinned, and tony grinned back. this could be some fun.

**Author's Note:**

> pretty pretty please give me some validation for my bad writing in the form of kudos and comments if you happen to stumble across this


End file.
